The Plot Twist of Practicing Patience

The Plot Twist of Practicing Patience

Sometimes what you thought you really wanted and thought you really needed wasn’t actually what you wanted nor needed. The act of practicing patience is a skill on it’s own. It’s a combination between mental preparation, mental action, physical action, emotional action and preparation. You see you start off by setting yourself a goal or target to change or achieve something but rather than providing a specific time limit, time is what will limit you from achieving just want you desire. Instead of placing pressure to achieve what you want, the role is reversed where you work towards your goal at your own pace and allow time to manifest itself until you obtain your goal. Patience is never rushed and can never be rushed. You will become frustrated and angry before feeling encompassed with the will to give up and lose hope. Patience is an active journey that feels inactive. It teaches you to learn your way through the struggles, the complications, confusions and mishaps.

The best way to practice patience is to meditate. take a step out of the hustle and busy environment, which is clouding your perceptions and the vision to seeing your goal.

B R E A T H E . Let time take it’s cause. Stop stressing, just focus on your goal and gradually take a step towards it each day and before you know it you’re there.

Now if you’re reading this and wondering why I twisted the plot. Well, I realised that the journey and act of practicing patience will sometimes throw a plot twist along your way to see if you really know what you want and whether when something half as good or slightly different to what you had hope for, would sway your vision and change your goal? If so, did you find something better or did you lower your bar just because it almost fit the criteria of your goal? If you gave in to something lower than your anticipated goal, you may want to reconsider your choice because your journey to practicing patience has just added another plot twist and is not yet completed.

 

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Transitioning into 2017

Transitioning into 2017

Happy New Year Pink Shaders,

It’s fair to say that like any other year, there have been some highs and lows. We have seen great legends pass away, the rise of in justice to sexuality, race and even gender. The divide amongst humanity was the most popular headline throughout 2016.

A non- factual election, which saw the 2 oldest presidential candidate of a powerful nation use social media and tit-for-tat strategy to pounce on their opponent, instead of elaborating on their strategies to help the environment, unify communities, develop the economy and the list goes on.

But then in 2016, there were some great moments. The year saw some amazing successes, the rise in female empowerment,  Black Girl Magic and world records being broken. Above all the greatest lesson to top it all off is that you can beat all obstacles, regardless of your qualification (this is a reference to sports not just politics).

Now that we are in 2017, everyone is trying to live up to their new years resolution and that’s great. But are you coming prepared with the correct mentality? The issues you faced in 2016 did not just magically erase itself as soon as it hit midnight. Oh no! So ask yourself, what struggles, moods or perceptions did I have in 2016 that still require a better understanding or transformation in me? What ideas did I have during 2016 that I never got to pursue because of lame excuses like time, motivation or resources? I say this because we are all born with the same starter pack in life- 24hrs, a brain to think and our body. Now think of ways to improve 2016 self in 2017. That way you are being more realistic with yourself and  you’ll feel more in charge of goals you hope to achieve, bare in mind this will encourage you to have a positive mindset to living a better life.

For 2017, it is my hope for all of us to come together in peace. I know a lot people are living in fear, especially for those targeted by some of these new appointed leaders and their capability destruct. We need to work as a supportuve community and become more educated and willing to understand differences. I also hope that 2017 will bring great self- development, especilly for those who had a rough time through 2016.

It’s time we make 2017 a good year. Not for our own reasons but for all. I know for myself, I want to see more confidence in me.  I have spent a little more than  what was due, being shy and scared to reach out for things that I was scared to let down.

Remember,

“when they go low we go high. And when they go high, we go low”

– Michelle Obama –

Starting University 

Starting University 

I remember the day before going to university. I was nervous. My poor body was shaking with anxiety because I didn’t know what to expect. I was thinking what is my life going to be while I’m out there because I’ve never lived away from home and usually I have a list of rules that I have to abide to because of my strict parents. I was also thinking of whether I am going to make any friends seeing that I was starting school later than all my peers; or will I enjoy my classes? After all, I probably switched degree paths 5 times, before concluding to pursue a degree in Business. This was just difficult. However, the night before, my dad sat me down and told me that things are going to be ok. At least that was where he began, before giving me a list of rules that I needed to abide by whilst living on campus. “You need to be home by 8pm! If I you’re not home by then I will remove you from that school”, he said. “And be careful of the friends you make. No boys, no parties, no alcohol. Nothing! Just go to class, go to the library, go home and go to church. You hear me!” In my mind I responded with yes sir! But my eyes showed a completely different picture. My eyes were already filled with tears. I was a “bawler” at that time, a cry baby whenever I got told off or things weren’t going as planned.

The next day, we set out to my university. It wasn’t that far of a drive from our house to the school and so after a 30 minute drive; and the countless times we got lost because my dad thought he knew where the student accommodation was, we finally got there. It was raining. Not quite pouring, but enough to make my nervous day feel like a miserable day. The Fresher’s Angels came out to help me collect my welcoming pack, before moving into my dorm room. My room was fairly decent. I had a single bed and a window with a view piercing out to the other blocks. It wasn’t that bad. My dad and my sister sat down on the bed and stared blankly at my room. “This looks like a prison cell” chuckled my sister . “Eh, it is what is”, I replied. My dad then got up, and said  “well you have 3 years in this place. You have heard what I told you yesterday and so I will be coming by to check that you are home. You don’t have time to be messing around”. I nodded and again my eyes started to flood with tears. “You are crying? For what reason? Or do you want go home? Ahh just stop it!” dictated my dad ” just a few more years”. As I tried to recollect myself, he got up, gave me a hug and said “let us pray before we go”. I hadn’t realised that this was starting to get a little emotional for him too because I was too busy having crybaby tears in my eyes. After praying, both my sister and my dad left. I sat back in my room and began to cry. At least for another hour, wondering whether I’ve made the right decision on whether to go to university to study something that i wasn’t a 100% sure about. It is what it is I thought to myself. My flowing tears were ruddy (so I thought) interrupted by someone who was knocking at my door. It was my next door neighbour. One tall black, guy in a tracksuit. Boy I felt short at that moment in time! “Hey my name is John, I live next door. I moved in yesterday along with pretty much everyone else in the house. What’s your name?” I introduced myself to him as I took in a few deep breaths to bring myself together, from what felt like the most devastating event of my lifetime. We chilled in the kitchen for a little while, before I decided to head back to my room and unpack my stuff, to make myself fell a little more like home.

As the evening approached, and the sun had set, I lay on my bed, listening to my Gospel music, which were blaring through my laptop speakers. In the midst of my solo moment, there was a knock on my door. With embarrassment, I paused the music, fixed myself up and opened the door to see who was outside. Before me stood 2 new guys, VJ and Alex. “Hey!”, I said with a smile (still embarrassed by the fact that the entire house could have heard my awful singing. “Hey”, they said unanimously. “I’m VJ and this is Alex, we are your neighbours up here and thought we’d introduce ourselves. Will you be heading to the ‘T shirt party’ tonight at the on- campus nightclub?” said VJ.”Wait what party?” I asked in confusion. “It’s run by the Student Union as an introductory party. Each house was given a t-shirt as part of our welcoming present, which we’ll need to customize and wear. The house with the most representatives wins a prize. I’ve heard from my older siblings that it’s either free entry to a concert, £10 gift voucher or sometimes something completely random. But I know it’s always had a crazy turnout, you should definitely come!” “Err yes sure, I’ll see if I’m coming out. I’m not really a party person because I don’t dance nor drink. But I’ll let you know a little later if I’m coming”, I replied politely, not trying to sound like a weirdo or anything.

After an hour of pondering and seeing people wearing their customer designed shirt, I decided to go. But only for an hour! Just so that I can bond with my housemates for a little while and then come home. Our house colour was pea green and our animal was a stag. At the venue there were hundreds of people wearing yellow, orange, red, blue, purple customized shirts. I on the other hand did not know how to be creative, other than transform my t-shirt into a simple crop top, using a black hair tie. The night was amazing. And without any alcohol, I was able to enjoy my first night as a university undergrad.