The attitude and journey to success

The attitude and journey to success

​” Success is not an exception but a prevailing attitude” – John Begin

For a while I have been trying to motivate  myself to get back on track. Back to that confident, high motivated and happy person that I used to be. I started of by writing multiple lists of things that I wanted to achieve but never had the time to pursue  or missed the opportunity because I lacked in confidence to take on that challenge. These ranged from large goals to the smallest; they all carry a significant value that is life changing in many different ways.

The way to look at this is like building your own home. I bet that growing up, you envisioned how big your house would be, how many rooms it will have, the number of bathrooms, the style of the interior design, having a movie room etc. You know to build that dream home in your mind, you engaged in a deep thinking process also known as your imagination, which allowed you to,  plan each aspect of your property. You know very well  that to be able to have that kind of home, you need to have a good job that can provide for that kind of budget. So you start to think of careers that you can imagine yourself being in, so that you can afford that house and the lifestyle that comes with it.

 Bringing this back to my list of things to achieve, I had to imagine what I want to achieve in my future, in order to note it down in my present so that I can work towards the dream becoming real in my future.

Once I felt that my list was somewhat  concluded, I glanced over it with an open mind and asked myself, what is that I can do now to in order to get closer to achieving one of these goals on my list?
So for one of the goals I wanted to drive my own car. That is two things in itself. 1 this meant getting my license and 2 searching for the right car. So in the midst of feeling low and ‘unconfident’ (if that’s even a word), I booked my theory test and once I passed that I booked my practical test. I also searched for driving instructors and I also searched for the types of cars I’d be interested in purchasing.

It took a while and it felt like forever, when it really was a few months but with the little ounce of motivation that I had in myself, I was able to gradually achieve the aspired goal. I applied the same factor to each goal and even included a few more that I was able to achieve.

***Once quoted by legendary BBC presenter “In times of povert abd struggles we have the natural aspiration to do something with our life and times better for ourselves. ***

With time, motivation and perseverance, you will start to notice more ticks of achievements than goals.

“When they go high we go low and when they go low, we go high”- Michelle Obama.
The 2016 US Presidential election brought a lot of high hopes to females. Here stands a woman in a race for the highest postion of a powerful country. She ensured a big fight time what many, as well as myself perceived as a bully.
There will be moments when you wil feel like an opportunity has been stolen from you by somebody you feel is undeserving or incapable of handling what you think is yours. Those are all feelings; and you have the right to have this emotion. But don’t believe that everything offered to you is for you. In life there are 2 explanations for why certain things happen.

All lessons are a blessing and a curse at the same time because we are either able to achieve a new heights or God had another plan for us… Something better.
In the other hand we are in our low stage. We are in the process of being crafted for the next best thing for us. Note “for us”. This means that not everything was created for you.
Tyler Perry’s  infamous character Madea rightly said in a play…  you don’t know why things happen but you best believe that some things happen for a reason or a season. A reason because they are here to teach you a lesson and be out the door or a season, to fill up that empty void until the next best thing is to come.
The road to success is an independent journey that needs to be completed by myself but supported with the people and experience one encounters along the way.  Whether it appears to be good or bad, reason will show itself in future.

Good luck and keep going!

University Guide 101: How to survive your freshers! First year guide- Semester A Edition

University Guide 101: How to survive your freshers! First year guide- Semester A Edition

Oh boi! Freshers has just started and for those who are still arriving on campus (even though it’s mid- October), can be feeling either nervous, excited or the stress has already kicked in. And to be honest that is completeky normal. However, to help kick-start your accademic year into good shape, I think that there are 7 simple steps that will help you survive your first year. FYI they have all been tested and they all work!


1)  The Treasure Chest
 

For some of us leaving home for the first time, this could seem a little daunting. And quite often we underestimate or sometimes not at all think about the basic items we will need in our student accommodation. Items like bedding, stationaries and clothes, are pretty much the first few items we think of. However, food staples, first aid packs, basic medication, kitchen utensils are oftwn overlooked. Moreover, it doesn’t help with the fact that we are seeing such large sums of money showing in our bank accounts by Student Finance, at the start of the year. Also, because we get too excited by this large amount of money sitting in our account (waiting to be taken by rent), we become too optimistic with our money and then Pop! There goes the last £100 to spend for the next 3 months. I tell you that feeling is not nice at all. And this when the treassure chest of goods that were donated by family and friends from home, becomes your best friend and essentially your life saver! 

Check out http://www.studentgiftparcel.co.uk (see above). This is a great place for your family and friends to get a good idea on what to pack in your box of goodies. They can choose from seasonal to freshers or nutritional parcels, which is then packed up and delivered right to your door!

I remember when I was preparing for my first year at university, my mother had an idea to create a treassure chest of basic goods. In it were random bits and bobs of canned items, 1kg of salt, 1 bag of sugar, pasta,  ramen noodles, chopping board, soy sauce, rice, tin opener, (I hope you get the gist). This box helped me go through some of the toughest moments at school, where I had no money for food, however it allowed me to be creative with the stock I had. And believe it or not, at the end of the year I even came home with some unopened items!

So what are you waiting for? Get cracking! Start of by asking people to donate food staples ie pasta, tinned food, salt, sugar etc, which doesn’t require a fortune but helps you get a long way while you are at uni.

2) Staying 100

Freshers flu is Real!! And it doesnt have to occur durring freshers. Nobody likes being ill! So why risk your body to the cold weather which is fas approaching. As much as we want to enjoy ourselves and maximise every uni event on campus, you should always remember to keep yourself warm and healthy, as much as possible. Even if it means covering up for most of the day and taking a jacket with you whenever you leave home to an event. I mean  £2 on cloackroom is really not bad compared to £4 on cold and flu pills or syrups and feeling completely crap about yourself. Also, stocking up on your vitamins is another preventative method to avoid being ill. These are easily purchasable over the counter at your local chemist or supermarkets such as ASDA, Tesco  or even health food stores like Holland and Barret. Increasing your dosage to the reccomended dailly allowance on vitamin C, D, B, A, K, calcium, iron and  antioxidants, will help you stay in better shape over the cold months and hopefully avoiding the ‘Flu season’. You coukd howe0ver get in the groove of eating healthy, by maintaining a diet plan. And no its not for people on a diet… its a good way to make sure that you are staying in shape and can also be used as a budgeting tool to watch over your spending (look at the next point1). Lastly, just as eating healthy is important, so is exercise! Get in the habit of working out an hour a day. This doesn’t necessarily  mean going to the gym for an hour, you could easily find simple workout YouTube videos or apps that allow you to exercise at home, and doesn’t require a lot of sweat.

3) Savings Saved Saves: Budgeting and Accounts 

Saving as a student can sound like a BIG MYTH! I know because I’ve been there! My first 2 years at university, called for extreme saving, where I basically set myself a realistic budget comprising on daily and weekly allowances, based on the amount received by Student Finance and subtracting my rent and bills.

With the amount remaining, 10% went towards my savings account and anything remaining from that amount was then divided by up for groceries, entertainment and anything extra. If that seems difficult, then it might be also time for you to get a job on campus!

4) Don’t be broke! 

Every student needs that extra bit of mulla to spend on something (often unnecessary) and that’s ok. Campus jobs in my eyes are the best way forward, in ensuring that you balance your academic career, whilst generating some cash on the side and gaining some experience. Whether it is the university, student union or any third party organisation providing a service on campus, they all abide by the rule of having to understand that your work is scheduled around your education and not the other way like off-campus employers. This means that there is a lot more flexibility in changing your hours, in order for you to catch up with your studies etc. Also, the pay for on-campus jobs can be quite decent. Some of ehich are above the minimum wage. In some cases, some universities like mine have a general rule where students are allowed to work on-campus up to 20 hrs per week. So look at your university/ Student Union job board for some of these opportunities.

5)  Staying Organized and avoiding the “P”- word

I cannot stress how important time management and organisation is at university. But very often we (as in studemts… including myself) find ourselves doing things last minute. This my friend is subjected to what we know as  PROCRASTINATION! Procrastination is when you pick up your book or open your work on your computer/ laptop and have the intention to study but further delay the actual action by watching TV, engaging in deep thought conversation or others, before realising how much time has passed to then catch up with work as quickly as they can. This is a REAL issue that every student falls into. To minimise falling into that trap, I would suggest getting a mobile app like ‘My Studylife’ (see below) which will allow you to view your timetable, as well as schedule when your work is due and make plans as to how much should be achieved between “now” and the due date. You can also set yourself reminders along the way to let you know how many days you have left in order to complete your assignment.

6) Study Groups 

Ultimately, university can introduce you to some amazing people. From meeting the smartest people you have ever come across, to those who like to keep lifw simple, or the ones that like to question every hypothesis to finding the most awkwardly talented person. All these different types of people bring great attributes to your life, which in effect could enhance your university experience. Forming study groups with people on the same educational pathway as yourself will allow you to either catch up with work that you’ve missed or be able to get a second opinon/ explanation  of a topic that you didn’t quite understand. Also, following in from my last point, being part of a study group can encourage all of you to try and stay focused on the assignment and possibly decreasing the chances of procrastinating because the sole purpose of meeting up as a group is to get on with your work.

7) They say becoming a teachers pet But I call it networking with academics!

Your lectures and tutors know exactly what you need to do in order to ACE the class. I mean of course, they designed the program and they know exactly how it should run. Just by speaking to them and asking frequent questions, you might be able to get a little insight as to what they are expecting from you. They may not say it to everyone in class but if you speak to them, you will be given a lot more hints regarding your assignment and voila, there you have a 2:1 or a 1st!

At the end of the day, the best way to survive your time at university is to have fun while you study, be yourself and avoid getting into little “dilly- dally” troubles. It’s a time not only to learn about your course but also to learn a little more about yourself. 

Peace… Inner Peace💙

Peace… Inner Peace💙

PEACE… such a simple and calm word yet so difficult to accomplish, especially in this day and age where it seems to be anything and everything going on at the same time. Achieving inner peace is just another hurdle to overcome in the current social, technological and economic environment. Nowadays, it’s difficult to spend some quality time alone because society tries to get us involved in either interact with one another on a number of trending issues through the ones close to you or through social media, which is driven through technological device like mobile phones, laptops, TV, tablets you name it. With technology becoming ever increasingly smarter and convenient to users, many of us result to spending quality time alone with our devices, to either search for inspiring information to stay positive, or treating oneself to a treat through online purchases, rather than developing your own inspiration from within. Furthermore, by being surrounded by all these distractions, it can become quite overwhelming, in realising what your mind, body and soul are actually longing for, in order to feel at peace.

The aim of achieving inner peace, is to peacefully care for yourself by replenishing your spirit, distress and give yourself the time to heal. Achieving inner peace is a process that takes you on a journey to experience and enjoy your own personal journey, particularly when recovering from a mental or emotional trauma. 

So if attaining inner peace is about staying away from all these different types of distractions, how is it possible to achieve this alone time with any given circumstances?

Well, the message is in the time. Inner peace is achieved after a period of time, which is spent alone in tranquillity to connect with yourself (mind, body and soul). Some may result to meditation either for religious reasons or a form.of exercise through Yoga, pilatese, mindfulness or simply working out in the gym. Other means include reading, painting, DIY, and any other light hobbies that enable a state of serenity. 

Nevertheless, over the past year and a bit, I have grown to practice having as much time alone as I possibly can. And as a busy student who was engaged in many activities at university, whilst studying full-time as well as working every day, my moments were often ceased in the morning, whilst walking 15 minutes to my bus stop and back home, and over the weekend. This routine consisted of taking deep breaths and meditating whilst on my way. In previous years, my go to distressed was working out at least 2 times a week and making sure that I maintained a healthy diet. However due to circumstances, rather than exercising in the gym my exercise resulted through my walks, which at first seemed a little stressful but eventually became a habit over some time and I began appreciating the moments I did have to myself.

Overall, inner peace takes time to create and time to achieve. It’s a process that cannot be rushed but with time and dedication, can be become the best investment in such little time. Even through a hectic schedule, you will treassure the moment you had to draw up energy, which you initially thought you didnt have. Moreover, the benefits you reap from gaining inner peace allow you to become in sync with yourself mind, body and soul. It allows you to heal and overcome any trauma that you have encountered and overtime help you to love and establish yourself to not only inspire yourself to look after yourself more but the benefits transpire through you and to others who are surround by you. So go ahead and give yourself some time alone. Your body deserves it!

Love thy neighbour and yourself

Love thy neighbour and yourself

​I’ve recently noticed how easily I get mad at myself when things don’t go right. I blame myself for making the little mistakes, which result to greater mishaps such as grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge, only to realise that it was actually in the pantry. Those extra steps would therefore cause further delays in me missing my first bus and unevetably my second and third bus for work. On the contrary, I found it a lot easier to forgive others who have either done wrong to me or let me down in situations whereby I desperately needed their support. 

This form of dissatisfaction can easily lead to further consequences like laxk of self respect, distust as well as creatibg new fears, causing more harm to yourself and possibly lead to depression and anxiety. So to break this self- destructive path of mine, I’m making a conscious decision to make peace with myself and to appreciate the positive and negative events that occur in life.

The reason why I decided to give this segment  this title is because I believe it is just as important to forgive yourself as it is to forgive others around you. It’s this notion of finding your balance and that peace that you have with you inner self and the outside environment. Be it the physical environment ie nature, the location and or society, mental, emotional and the spiritual environment that we are constantly surrounded by.

Graduation

Graduation

After 4 years of long-suffering, endless all night studies, a hundred litres of tears and many hours of self-doubting moments on why on earth did I decide to procastinate, I am glad to say that I am now a graduate! As torturous as it all sounds, it was all worth it in the end.

Being at university taught me a lot of skills. Most of which was related to personal development rather than my degree itself. I learnt how to manage my time and projects so that I am able to meet my deadlines, optimise my opportunities to network with key individuals in the professional world (easy and for free) and I got to know myself a lot more (I know it sounds strange but I’ll explain later).

Now although my degree programme in Busines was supposed to have lasted 3 years, I decided to extended it by another year, in order to make the most of what my school had to offer. I decided to Study Abroad.If you ever come across this opportunity, I say “GO FOR IT“! I believe that this was the best and by far my favourite investment in my life so far. It had always been my dream to study in the United States but I thought that it was too expensive for my bank account. Thank God my student loans were able to cover this experience. And if you do get the opportunity to work abroad, see it as a double whammy! You get to live in another country, whilst earning some extra cash while you are out there. Just note that those opportunities are hard to find and require extra time to search, apply and plan. In advance. So if you know that’s what you want, then start a semester earlier than those applying to study abroad.

But anyways, my graduation made me realise how much I’ve achieved and how far I’ve come. From being that scared, timid late-teen, who started university later than everyone else, to becoming a confident, determined and challenging  young woman I am today. I’ve grown to love and respect myself first, organise my time wisely and do things outside of my comfort zone, in order to add them to my list of achievements and increase my confidence. More importantly I was able to conquer many of my fears, adding extra value to these achievements and for some of them realising that it wasn’t that bad after all.

I remember my first semester, I was dreading doing my economics module because I had failed it 3 times previously during my AS Levels. It took being litterally shaken into grips by my friend, to “man up and take control of my fears”, before attaining a first class in my second semester. But all that while, I had to work hard and play smart in order to find a way to tackle this problem of mine. And as ironic as it sounds ‘with sheer determination and hard work, I was able to conquer my fear and achieve something from this experience’.

Another thing that graduation reminded me was that I was worried of being the oldest person to graduate, when I first started my degree. I thought I’d be the laughing stock and seen as the “slow developer”. But realistically, throughout my 4 years I realised that on many occasions, it was the least of my concerns as most people mistook me for being much younger than what I was. And to be real with you, I even forgot that it was my concerns because at university, age doesn’t mean anything if you don’t know how to act accordingly. If your time at university does not transform your mindset or attitude towards affecting issues like dealing with various personalities, encountering challenging situations then you have not made the most of your university experience.

In all, I know this is going to sound crazy yet it seems quite real, wouldn’t mind going through this struggle a second time around by pursuing my Masters!

Job hunting after finishing University

Job hunting after finishing University


Job hunting after finishing university is really not that easy. Especially if you are still trying figure yourself out, the career path you’re hoping to pursue  etc. And to be real with you… that is litterally almost every undergraduate and in some cases postgraduate. In my mind, before completing my degree, I thought I knew I had my future all figured out. No really! I had soo many contingency plans just in case one or the other would fail. But guess what, none of them went according to plan and in fact ended up in a different scenario than I really imagined. I even have myself deadlines to meet. But you can’t really have any control as to which organisations pick you, read your application, invite you to an interview and offer you a job. And as a Christian, I  believe that the joke is on you when  you try to out plan God. Oh yes, He will take you of course just to show you who is the boss.

So, I’ve been pretty much looking for a graduate or trainee job for a couple of months now. These jobs are predominantly with the marketing, Events and business development areas. I came across a few roles which I never knew really existed, such as conference producing. Sounds interesting right.  It is if you enjoy finding a topic for large corporations to invest a large amount. What is more, these events can take place anywhere in the world. To me that’s pretty much exciting.

I was called for an interview with one Conference Producing role, which I attended. As per usual, I carried out some independent research  about the company and the role, in order to prepare me when they ask me what I know.  It was the hardest interview I have ever attended. They asked me intricate hypothetical questions to try and throw me off, and then they would question me on everything that I said. Do with that being said, I was always questioning what I had said and whether I had said the right thing. As someone who sometimes struggles to sell herself, I definitely found it quite difficult to drop in my strengths. Now the question is, do I feel like I did my best to answer all the questions? Yes. Did you respond to every question ? Kind of. How c9nfident do you feel that you’ll get a  call back? Not too sure. Is there room for improvements? Definitely! Why? Because there is always room for improvements and we learn as we go to perfect it to one stage, then  go through another process to move to the next level up. I just know that the job for me is waiting round the corner and I just can’t give up just yet!

Life’s Journey

Life’s Journey

So today at church I had the privilege of presenting a bible scripture that means a lot to me from the Church Family Bible. I decided to focus on Matthew 6:6-14, which is the model prayer that Jesus used to teach his disciples how to pray.
6 But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. 7 And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. 8 Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.
9 “This, then, is how you should pray:
“‘Our Father in heaven,
hallowed be your name,
10 your kingdom come,
your will be done,
on earth as it is in heaven.
11 Give us today our daily bread.
12 And forgive us our debts,
as we also have forgiven our debtors.
13 And lead us not into temptation,[a]
but deliver us from the evil one.[b]’
14 For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.
Sometimes in life we get too carried away with the things occurring in our day to day life, that we forget to give ourselves a break.
Our hearts and minds go through storms of highs and lows, effectively clouding our judgements on what our actual needs are from our desires. To spend a brief moment in quietness and having that encounter with God is sometimes all that is needed to balance yourself out. God knows what’s best for us because our future was planned way ahead of us. And so when we come to Him, he provides us with our daily dosage of mental, emotional, physical and spiritual food, to keep us going to achieve the things we were destined to do.
And whilst we are on our journey to achieving our destiny, we need to learn to “travel lightly”. Unpack all your worries, your anger and frustrations that you have with other people who have done you wrong INCLUDING OURSELVES. The heavier the load the slower you will be because YOUR LOAD IS JUST TOO MUCH! Give it all too God and let Him deal with it! All of it!
My time with God is spent whilst I’m on my way to work and on my way back. When do you spend your time with God?